Courtship and dating rituals

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Everyone seems to know someone who knows someone who is getting married to their online sweetheart.

But after connecting with thousands of women via my Facebook page and hearing their tales of missed dates, mixed messages, and misunderstood expectations, the horror stories seem to outnumber any purported success rate by a very wide margin. Don't we all hear how great the apps and sites are? You answer a few questions and then get to meet someone who is (supposedly) a great match.

In today’s technology-centric world — where everyone’s phone seems surgically attached to their hand — dating websites and apps are how modern singles find other singles.

Normally, this would be a great thing, as technology makes things better.

When Akiksuke brought Chiyoko to meet his family—after several outings to the beach, caf é s, beer halls and department stores—his siblings welcomed her in ways that reflected the changing times.

“Most couples in Tokyo just can’t afford to get married until the guy is around 30 unless they both work or he has an exceptional job, or there is money in the family,” he wrote.

To meet possible compatible love partners, we started a new hobby, networked in our social circles, had friends set us up on blind dates, and generally spent some time looking for someone just as amazing/screwed up as we are.

But with the advent of technology, "dating" doesn't exist anymore.

“These kids go out with other couples and act more or less like you would expect western young lovers to act.”While the photographs capture the increasing normalization of modern Western customs in Japan, they also exhibit the excitement and tenderness of being allowed to choose—a privilege which, of course, includes the right to opt out.

It seems like everyone's looking for love online ... A few short years ago, we had to put some actual effort into dating and finding love. We connected with friends and headed out on the town/to the bar/to the game.

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